Our
14th annual Wergle
Flomp Humor Poetry Contest welcomes your entry through April 1.
There's no fee to enter.Jendi
Reiter will judge, assisted by Lauren
Singer. We'll award $2,000 in prizes, including a top prize of $1,000.
Winners are published on our website.
This
contest welcomes published and unpublished work. Your poem may be of any length.
Click
to submit online.
After
screening last year's 4,484 entries, Lauren has advice for this year's
contestants:
Parodies
based on Poe, "The Night Before Christmas", Yeats, and Frost: If you
are going to have a "With Apologies To..." poem, it needs to be clever enough to
back up the fact that it is based on a famous original. So many of these poets
jumped ship somewhere in the middle and did not utilize any clever parodying
qualities, and merely wrote poems that were completely separate from the
originals. Just stealing the voice of a dead poet does not a good poem make!
Poems
that I found particularly arduous to read: Poems about pooping,
farting, vomiting, getting fat, having saggy boobs, tricking your husband so
that he would stay with you, tricking your wife so that she would leave you,
wrinkles, chocolate addiction, unoriginal limericks that began "There once was a
man from Nantucket" that ended with "f*** it!", poems that invented their own
language without a glossary and just translated as wan gibberish.
Poems
that were offensive: Ones that embraced a pro-rape culture (there were
more of these than you might think, and it was quite disheartening); poems that
described women as objects; poems that led the reader to believe they were about
women and then turned into poems about an object (odes to a car, boat, La-Z-Boy,
golf club, burger, guitar, etc.); homophobic, sexist, xenophobic, racist poems,
of which there were many; poems that mock a lifestyle in attempts to undermine
it (making light of stay-at-home moms/dads, that sort of thing); poems that made
light of mental illness, addiction, and recovery, in an offensive way as opposed
to a self-deprecatingly humorous way.
"I'm
getting so old" poems: These were by far the highest number of poems
submitted in 2014. These have the ability to be funny, but more often than not
there is SO much overlap. "I used to be so attractive, thin, energetic. Now I'm
fat, wrinkly, and don't have sex. I can't bend over anymore, I can't sit up
without grunting, I can't eat fried foods, I can't enjoy life because I'm over
60." These become tiring and disheartening after a while. There were a few that
embraced an original voice and those made the cut, but the vast majority of
poems about aging were nearly indistinguishable from each other.
Feeling
squirrelly: There were well over a hundred poems solely about
squirrels. This is merely a side note, as some of them were quite funny, but out
of sheer curiosity, what the hell was it about squirrels this year? What is this
obsession? Why are squirrels so dang poetic? Any squirrel poems that ended in a
pun about nuts generally didn't make the cut.
All
the Wergle Flomp winning poems and judges' comments going back to 2002 are
available for reading in our website
archives.
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